For those of you who do not know Mormons are baptised at the age of 8 where all of their sins are washed away, and any sins that remain after the age of 8 are kept for life. (Until repented, but my 7 year old self did not know that). My older brother had just got baptised a little earleir (he is 14months older than me), and he got himself into trouble days after his baptism. I remember thinking that I was going to not complete a single sin after mine. This spurred two thoughts into my mind:
- Wishing that I would be chosen by God to fulfill his personal wishes. I was willing to be chosen to kill and fight his enemies. Not because he had them, but it was in my realm of what I was willing to do to show my devotion.
- I loved my family, and longed to be able to show the highest love and devotion to both them, and my God. The highest level of devotion to me was remaining strong during torture. And this lasted for ten years where I wanted nothing more than to be tortured, and die from the torture. Not because I wanted to die, but because I wanted my life to have meaning.
Because if you die at the end of your lifespan, and nothing continues afterwards in the athiest poist of view, then there is no reason to live in the first place.
If there’s no everlasting benefit that you are working towards, and it all ends anyway than what is the point? So obviously I’m biased towards religion which is much more complex and interesting than, “it. just. ends.” As well as why immortality is so estatic in my mind. The beautify of Twilight for me lies in the estatic euphoria of this immortality, and it’s a shame that no one I try to explain this to understands.