While scrolling through youtube I came accross this show where they were talking about willpower and how that relates to diet, and life. // Fat Shaming & Thin Privilege (from Joe Rogan Experience #411 & #413).
The idea is that you have to make decisions constantly, and the more decisions you have to make the harder is it to make them. When you have cravings for a food, or drug, ect, and you say no it takes effort, and it takes energy. It’s easy to tell someone that they should just choose not to do something, but until you’ve felt that craving – the craving where you don’t care if it damages you, if it decreases your lifespan- you just need the craving to stop. Until you’ve felt that craving you can’t say you understand what they’re going through. People that get over their problems will forget about the experience as well (humans tend to forget about the worse things they’ve been through and instead remember the better things.) Myself excluded but that’s another topic.
This willpower is not the same as making a decision. It is making a decision that you would rather not have to make. Making this decision in the chosen direction is painful whereas the other choice would not be as painful. (Instead regretted).
I bring this up because in a previous post I mentioned having held onto a desired personality trait for a maximum of two weeks or so. In a way I thought of this because I could have continued the personality, but each time an event occured which weakened my stance and I had to make the choice of whether to continue or “give up.”
*Flake out the first date but still wants to try – ok, act like nothing’s happened but “waiting for it to fall apart.”
*Too busy to hang out on the weekend when I have four days off – little fishy, but I can trust and not get worried about it / Enters the state of expecting her to make the next major move
*She goes out on a date with someone else – Ok now I feel like a tool. I could probably still chase her, perhaps win her over but my mind just drops and cuts her loose.
I know that, in writing all of this down, it is not anywhere near the same as the pain of trying to get healthy, but it is difficult to make the choice, and each choice is more difficult than the last until you “cave.”
I feel like this supply of willpower is only tapped into when it is out of your comfort zone, and I don’t feel as though the limited amount of explanation that I’ve covered stressed this point enough. Any and all decisions in your comfort zone have a smaller requirement of willpower, per se, and also can easily be trained by your mind to be made with no effort continously. Choices that you are not used to making, and are more difficult to make are the ones where it drains you in this sort where it comes accross as a “limited supply” rather than in a way where you can train your mind to make the decision easier.
*Each time you say no to bad food it gets easier to not eat the bad food – training your mind
*Eating better, working out, asking out girls you feel are out of your league, standing and giving lectures to a crowd, skydiving – each one is out of your comfort zone in its own way and working on one of them doesn’t make the other magically easier to master and deal with.
If you do have multiple things you want to work on do keep in mind that you can hold your mommentum when breaking your comfort zone. As in if you make a list of the things and start doing them one after another you build mommentum where it is easier to do each task. This is because your mental state is in a bit of shock and the comfort zone walls are weakened. Do keep in mind that the shock will also keep the action from sticking.* What I mean is that if you do all of them in a roll many of them won’t stick out and instead of working on, say giving lectures, you focused on breaking barriers instead of lecturing itself. It won’t be the same as if you only gave a lecture and is dilluted by the other actions as well. ! SO. ! Hold the mommentum for a while longer for it to stick so that the comfort zone doesn’t come back… ….
But once always makes the second time easier.
Oh my gosh just reading about willpower and food makes me think about how I used to have these terrible sugar cravings. I don’t even eat candy anymore (basically at all) just because I’m half way scared the cravings would come back.
Ummmm, for those that have a craving that they’re trying to get over I’ll just give this advice and even put it into bold.
Don’t have a cheat day. Don’t eat the food as a reward, don’t give yourself a weekend, just don’t. Nothing is more painful than being clean for a month, and then letting yourself bing “just this once,” and finding yourself addicted again. It’s not about seeing what you’re missing, ect/ect – you have the potential to kick back up your hormones, and you’ll have such a harder time saying “no,” and it’ll be so much harder, and it’ll so much more energy. I’m not against having those days morality/judgement wise… Everyone is different, and cheat days are not something that work for me.