Holding Back

I had agression problems as a young child, and I’d always get mad and throw a fit.  I learned quickly to hold back and control myself.

If you’ve read other posts, you’d understand how intense I was raised to hold back sexually.  No cursing, even if everyone else did.  Not talking back,  not sharing opinions, studying instead of playin video games.  There’s a culture of holding back.

I’ve had homocidal and pedophilic desires.  I can’t control them any more than wanting to eat ice cream, but I’m not at risk of doing either.  I could hide them, but I’d rather have those who feel the same get help instead of continuing in silence until they crack, and how can I expect others to do what I cannot do myself?  Lead by example.

Quitting your job to work for youself, what’s holding you back?

Approach the girl, what do you have to lose, what’s holding you back?

… I’m just use to holding back in this culture that teaches one thing and expects another.

I’m doing exponentially better than before, but I’m still easily burned.