It’s hard to make new friends in a relationship, or at least this one, or maybe it’s always hard to make new friends.
No one is good enough to be her friend, but at the same time she gets so lonely or bored that anyone who speaks to her is good enough to be her friend.
Then they complain or need help, and she forces the help onto them, they feel obliged to take the help. Taking help can be dis-comfortable for some people, and for example: for me to take a present from you is me doing a favor to you. It’s hard to get me a useful present because if I need or want it I want to be able to provide it for myself.
Then they get dis-comfortable, or she pushes them aside, or flakes, or blows up on them. Friends are dispendisble to her. They aren’t going to stay in her life anyway, so why bother to try to keep them.
Her life has been so bad that she deserves to be able to do whatever she wants. If they want to be her friend they have to just accept it. They’ve had such a good life that they need to make the effort for her.
She’s already tried to be friends with them in the past, but they don’t say hi to her. Or when they say hi to her it’s only because they want something from her.
Talk about setting the situation up for failure.
But that’s her, what about me?
For some reason, the only people I can make a connection with are people that… to say that the only people I can make a connection with are people that I would want to sleep with would be an overstatement. My idea of a perfect body image has… changed to my girlfriend’s body (minus the double chin and belly so I guess I’m still an ass).
But yeah, the girlfriend points out that everyone I try to be friends with is strangely on the more attractive side.
I feel more comfortable around more attractive people, why?:
- People who think of themselves as unattractive can feel a sense of entitlement where the people they see as more attractive had a better roll of the dice. As in they are willing to screw them over when the time comes, and not feel bad about it.
- People with a higher self image are not as depressing. They don’t constantly back talk themselves, and have a higher desire for pursuit, for improving themselves. For getting involved.
- That makes people with a higher body image more fun (potentially).
- And then, yeah they’re fun to look at.
I don’t owe you anything because I’m younger than you. My success was not free.
I don’t owe you anything because I weigh less than you. My weight was worth the effort to me. My weight was not free.
I don’t owe you anything because you think I’m more attractive than you. You could fit my image of a perfect girl just like I fit your image of a your perfect boy.
I don’t owe you anything because I am a male. There is female privilege just like there is male privilege.
I’m sorry for what you had to go through. I’m sorry that I can’t make you understand me.