Friendships in a Relationship

It’s hard to make new friends in a relationship, or at least this one, or maybe it’s always hard to make new friends.

No one is good enough to be her friend, but at the same time she gets so lonely or bored that anyone who speaks to her is good enough to be her friend.

Then they complain or need help, and she forces the help onto them, they feel obliged to take the help.  Taking help can be dis-comfortable for some people, and for example: for me to take a present from you is me doing a favor to you.  It’s hard to get me a useful present because if I need or want it I want to be able to provide it for myself.

Then they get dis-comfortable, or she pushes them aside, or flakes, or blows up on them.  Friends are dispendisble to her.  They aren’t going to stay in her life anyway, so why bother to try to keep them.

Her life has been so bad that she deserves to be able to do whatever she wants.  If they want to be her friend they have to just accept it.  They’ve had such a good life that they need to make the effort for her.

She’s already tried to be friends with them in the past, but they don’t say hi to her.  Or when they say hi to her it’s only because they want something from her.

Talk about setting the situation up for failure.

But that’s her, what about me?

For some reason, the only people I can make a connection with are people that… to say that the only people I can make a connection with are people that I would want to sleep with would be an overstatement.  My idea of a perfect body image has… changed to my girlfriend’s body (minus the double chin and belly so I guess I’m still an ass).

But yeah, the girlfriend points out that everyone I try to be friends with is strangely on the more attractive side.

I feel more comfortable around more attractive people, why?:

  • People who think of themselves as unattractive can feel a sense of entitlement where the people they see as more attractive had a better roll of the dice.  As in they are willing to screw them over when the time comes, and not feel bad about it.
  • People with a higher self image are not as depressing.  They don’t constantly back talk themselves, and have a higher desire for pursuit, for improving themselves.  For getting involved.
  • That makes people with a higher body image more fun (potentially).
  • And then, yeah they’re fun to look at.

I don’t owe you anything because I’m younger than you.  My success was not free.

I don’t owe you anything because I weigh less than you.  My weight was worth the effort to me.  My weight was not free.

I don’t owe you anything because you think I’m more attractive than you.  You could fit my image of a perfect girl just like I fit your image of a your perfect boy.

I don’t owe you anything because I am a male.  There is female privilege just like there is male privilege.

I’m sorry for what you had to go through.  I’m sorry that I can’t make you understand me.


Raisin Oatmeal Cookies

I was at home, and took out the cookies that I had purchased from the store.  I bit into them, knowing that they were Raisin Oatmeal, and bit into them.

I knew it was a dream.  I would never knowingly buy Raisin Oatmeal, and I always check.

I was curious to see if I could taste them.  Disgusting.  OK, they weren’t that bad.

Reign: The Most Feminist TV Show Out There

There’s a difference between a feminist TV show, a TV show/movie that encourporates these aspects.  And then there’s Reign.  A show broadcasted with CWTV, a drama show from a company that has a large audience with people who watch scyfy dramas.  Obviuosly, I don’t watch every show and compare them, but out of every show I’ve ever seen Reign is the most inspiring.

The show may only be starting to bring up and show the problems involved with women during this time.  I’m seeing their strength, and I hope it continues as I expect it will.


Mary & Francis : Francis cheats on Mary “while they’re apart,” and he has a baby with another girl.  Francis does terrible things and pushes Mary away.  Perhaps with due reason, but in reality it is because he does not trust her.  Mary in the end is hurt, and no longer trusts or loves Francis.  Francis decides that she may no longer do as she wishes, and Mary’s mother insists that she needs to have a child with Francis as soon as possible in order to maintain her throne.  In response Mary decides that she will not allow other people to control her life, and she will do as she pleases.  With a strategic plan of her own rather than just tossing everything aside. Very impowering.

Greer & Aloysius Castleroy : Castleroy accidentally funds an assasination attempt, they remain quiet and are banished from the castle.  There’s no sign of Castleroy in the show, but we may see Greer becomming a pimp.  Going to have to see what happens.

Kenna, Antoine, & Sebastian : Sebastion has a duty to the kind and the country where he goes around saving people.  Yay for the people, but he keeps on leaving Kenna alone, and expecting her to wait for him.  Kenna has just been given an opportunity to leave Sebastian to become a Queen.  I do hope, regardless of whether Antoine is doing this purposefully or not, that Kenna leaves Sebastian.  Sit around and wait for me, do nothing while I’m gone, my priorities should be yours.  As long as Kenna doesn’t ask forgiveness from Sebastian when Antoine’s plan unfolds.  I’ll be happy.

Lola.  The only one who has had a child with the king.  Who is expected to sit around as the prince’s mother and do nothing else.  Who has Narcisse there waiting to give her strength.  She should take it.  I really do like Narcisse, although his morals could do with a little touching up when it comes to religious tolerance.

Claude.  I’ll do as I please, you’re not allowed to get rid of me for being alive like some unwanted vegetable.  This may make her appear like a brat, but she’s immediately forgiven by me for anything considering that not a single soul deserves her affection.  If they did they could earn it.  (Poor Kenna though, she was the closest one to being able to form a bond, but theirs would be the hardest to make concerning the circumstances..)

Movie Review: The Normal Heart (2014)

Quoted from wikipedia: “The film depicts the rise of the HIV-AIDS crisis in New York City (among gay people) between 1981 and 1984, as seen through the eyes of writer/activist Ned Weeks, the founder of a prominent HIV advocacy group.”

This movie depicts homophobia, and ignorance of the facts from family, government, and social support groups as thousands of people get infected and die.

It depicts cure of homosexuality, and is taken as so as funding is ignored, and the people dieing are told that they are over-reacting.  How government officials selfishly ignore the facts, and hide from acting because it would hurt their repitation.

You are a fool if you believe that homophobia doesn’t exist.  You are a fool if you think that government is immune to tossing you aside for their own goals.

This movie brought up a good point about how it shows that minorities fight with each other, and in doing so they decrease their voice as other groups walk all over them.  Also, as your friends and family die I assume you are going to take a stronger action against it?  I would

It is hard to believe that with so many people dieing that it would be so hard to get a voice for yourself.  Also it would have been nice to have some sort of picketing/march?  Something that tries to get support from the public that isn’t just some emergency hotline.  They said something about being on the daily show.  That could have made for a brilliant scene.

Don’t watch this with anyone you don’t want to cry in front of.  I also would recommend it to anyone.  Beautiful film.

Why the flu shot doesn’t always work

I was going to title this “Why I don’t get the flu shot,” but that title post is actually a complete lie.  I don’t get the flu shot because I hate needles, and I’m a 22 year old male who hasn’t been sick since freshman year of college (I was 16.)

The flu shot does work, but not as intended.  The intent is, of course, to make it so that you don’t get the flu.  Even in college they say, “and sometimes they pick wrong.”  I say they likely pick right, and here is why:

My first instinct is that when everyone gets the shot it creates a heard immunity for the flu strains that are projected to be next in line for the area of interest.  Now since these strains are knocked out if un-mutated, the strains either mutate or get taken out.

So I hope that explains how you can still take the shot, but still end up sick later.  They will often say that they still might get sick, but not for as long.  This is because even though a few of the antigens shift – they don’t all shift at once.  There’s still some of the antigens of the virus that are known by your immune system and so it can be seen as the second case – and taken control of faster by the immune system.

So knowing this would I suggest taking the flu shot? Yes!! It creates a heard immunity that prevents an outbreak of a snowballing strain.  It makes it so that constant mutation is required, and keeps the number of cases down.  It prevents the more dangerous strains so that you’re caught in bed sick for days instead of weeks.  Fighting the virus is very important as we learn more about it.

*Just a thought, not based on scientific data or anything

Movie Review: Noah

Are you kidding me? Seriously?  I lcan list movies I walk away from as 2 stars.  Movies I don’t walk away from, but still watch because I had to buy them to watch (and wish I had walked away from) get 1 star.  That was Noah.  Terrible graphics, terrible storyline, no original ideas that I enjoyed.

Let us make a movie with a Christian title and a Christian audience to only throw aside every part of the movie to the wind in order to make a movie to reach for some sort of watchability.  In order to make up for it let us get Emma Watson to reach for an audience, and use B class specs in order to keep the costs of production low enough to make up for any loss in costs.

I almost turned off the movie half way through, but kept it on while I multi-tasked since I spent $20 on buying the movie.  In return I got an erratic Noah who had tossed aside his morals in order to kill his granddaughters.

Noah gets about three simple pages in the Bible.  A two hour movie that has three pages of discription, and the director can’t even follow the simple three pages of discription.  Three pages, and anything that goes apart from the actual descriptions only works to hurt the character of the people rather than build any sort of excitement or add any “holiwood factor.”

I’m going to throw in my bullet points (notes) and then walk away before wasting any more time on this title.

  • The nonexistent animals
  • Why would we do that, they think it makes us stronger, We don’t eat meat
    • The only reference to meat before, or directly after the flood is “don’t eat blood.”
  • The dream with the blood on the ground, and the dead people in the sea
  • Only the five of them, seriously?  They are supposed to the boat with their wives.  Half the story is based off of a change the director made.
  • Completely destroyed lands, no trees, dirty water.  The people are evil, but not to this obvious extent.  The people who attack at every turn, how do they sustain their lives.
  • Children pay no notice to the number of dead people around them.  I don’t know about you, but if any ten year old I come accross walks up to fifty dead bodies they wouldn’t search around without mentioning the bodies.  They wouldn’t be stronger about it than the adults.
  • Low production costs, value
  • “the three sons and their wives” – I don’t know or care where I got this quote from.
  • Children were not that young, one of them was not a baby when they were supposed to leave during the flood.  Noah was 600 years old, and his children were at least 100.  1/6 of a lifetime  of 40 years is still 10 years.
  • “fallen angels”
    • Fallen angels that care that humans betray the created or even though they were betrayed in turn.
  • His father was still alive until five years before the flood, Noah was shown as a boy when his father was killed
  • Talking to Him required the use of a drug.
  • A seed from the first garden, from Eden?  A place guarded by a flaming sword.
  • If a girl is born to you, I will cut her down.  Noah was willing to kill his grand daughter with only the speakings of himself, one weaker than that of the two dreams he required in order to build the ark?

Just One Bite

When you start a relationship with them (closed relationship), you agree to be with them, and only them.  You might really love strawberry ice cream, but you might also love vainlla, chocolate, orange.  The list goes on and on.  The difference is that relationships are not the same as the sense of taste.  A compelte devotion, and trust are required, and the attraction part, the ice cream flavor part, is only skin deep.  Lust is a skin deep emotion, and one that does not need to be the defining feature in your relationship.